It can be so tempting to lash out at a person who has just spewed hate on you. They say something hurtful, seemingly out of nowhere, and your first instinct is to fight back. It can also be tempting to take that hatefulness on and wear it around on your shoulders wondering why they acted this way toward you and what you could have done differently to avoid it all together.
The problem with both responses is that they give the power to that person. Those responses mean that that person has control over your emotions. The beauty of being a human and an adult is that we can decide how we feel and how we respond to situations.
Sometimes it is necessary to address someone who has just hurt you, but other times it is best to just let it go. It is very likely that the words flew out of the person’s mouth before they even realized it or the feelings that the other person may have in response. However, each person has a responsibility for their actions and emotions.
Whether you are the one throwing out hate or on the receiving end, love has the power to heal the wounds created. If you have just been thrown a curve ball by the one you love allow yourself to feel what you need to feel, but forgive them and remind yourself that they too are human and you love them. That does mean you have to pretend to be happy and that nothing happened, but it does mean giving them grace and not hold it against them.
The same holds true if you have just unleashed your wrath on someone. Unfortunately, you cannot take the words back, but you can forgive yourself and love the other person for loving you despite your flaws. Hanging on to guilt can be so tempting, but it will ultimately keep you from correcting the behavior.
Both people are hurt in these moments, so find it deep within to love each other. If you can love the person who just hurt you or love the person you just hurt, you will find that you will both grow and start to become better versions of yourselves. Happiness is about forgiving and loving one another, go forward and do all things through love.